Short Answer: Winston Churchill vs Bessie Braddock
Read the full encounter below.
Winston Churchill
Winston Churchill's retort to Labour MP Bessie Braddock in 1946
In the dim corridors of the House of Commons one weary evening in 1946, the air thick with the echoes of postwar debates, Winston Churchill—the once undisputed leader of England, fresh from his electoral defeat and now the grizzled Leader of the Opposition—shuffled toward the exit, his steps a touch unsteady from exhaustion rather than excess. Bessie Braddock, the formidable Labour MP for Liverpool Exchange, a no-nonsense socialist known for her sharp tongue and unyielding advocacy for the working class, spotted him and couldn’t resist a jab. “Winston, you are drunk,” she declared, “and what’s more, you are disgustingly drunk.” But Churchill, ever the master of repartee, pivoted with a wry smile and fired back: “Bessie, my dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly.” The quip, borrowed from a 1934 W.C. Fields film, sliced through the tension of a divided Parliament, where Conservative grandeur clashed with Labour’s reformist zeal, leaving Braddock’s accusation hanging like smoke from one of Churchill’s ubiquitous cigars.
Here are 10 of Winston Churchill’s most famous quotes, selected based on their enduring popularity and frequent citation in historical records and speeches
- “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
- “If you are going through hell, keep going.”
- “Never, never, never give up.”
- “We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”
- “Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.”
- “All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.”
- “History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.”
- “I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
- “I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat.”
- “No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all those other forms that have been tried from time to time.”
Here are a few more witty anecdotes about Winston Churchill, drawn from historical accounts that highlight his quick, sharp humor—often at the expense of others, but delivered with impeccable timing. Churchill’s wit was legendary, blending sarcasm, self-deprecation, and clever wordplay.
- During a heated debate, Conservative MP Lady Nancy Astor snapped at Churchill, “If I were your wife, I’d put poison in your coffee!” Churchill calmly fired back, “If I were your husband, I’d drink it.” The anecdote underscores his ability to turn an insult into a humorous escalation, leaving the room in stitches.
- When playwright George Bernard Shaw sent Churchill two tickets to the opening night of his new play with a cheeky note reading, “Bring a friend, if you have one,” Churchill responded via telegram: “Cannot make first night. Will attend second, if there is one.” This playful jab at Shaw’s work showcased Churchill’s love for verbal sparring with intellectual peers.
- On his 75th birthday in 1949, a reporter asked Churchill if he was ready to meet his maker. He quipped, “I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.” This self-deprecating remark reflected his irreverent humor even in contemplating mortality.
